The post in which we resort to name-calling
I was watching a re-run of To Gun on TV a few days ago for like the 368th time and it got me thinking, all that “Maverick” and “Goose” and “Merlin” and “Hollywood” and stuff. I mean, try hard as a grown-up *not* to view things in a different light now that Contra is just a bad, old video game not some awkward political incident and people have realized the risqué nature of all those Pet Shop Boys albums they owned, ah the 1980s gone bust, and here we are left wondering just how the hell has Top Gun survived. It did. Ferris Bueler´s Day Off did too, but that´s like The Catcher in the Rye of our generation. If Top Gun were a book it would´ve been… oh brother. I had something going there for a while now it just slipped. I´m open for suggestions, though. Oh wait. I still haven´t enabled comments on this blog have I? No. So in a sense, and it´s not what I originally had in mind (which I´ve forgotten so I´m thinking as I write this down) Top Gun could really be like; wait, you´re so gonna throttle me because of this one, The Picture of Dorian Gray. No sh*t, honest-to-god, get past all the very-gay-though-thankfully-never-explicit overtones (which Top Gun arguably has more than PDG) and you´re left with one damn good, gripping story. Can the political statement, the most important thing in the world´s a good story. Give me good fiction any day-- I´m in heaven.
But really. That Val Kilmer character “Iceman” is just too creepy in the movie. What´s that all about anyway?!
…And here I was thinking I´m this big genius for the Top Gun comments above but I´ve just realized I´ve seen someone else on TV saying something to that effect, I just don´t recall whether it was Tarantino or Kevin Smith. So there for justice.
Aaaand back to the callsigns (Maverick, Iceman, et. al.)
Here´s a very silly list without a purpose in which the author, well, lists a series of names he´s thought up about subjects most diverse:
1 . The name I´d give myself if I were my own son, but without having intercourse with my mother: (of course!)
ERIC VON RUTGER,
and believe it or not I once tried that line on a girl back in High School and it actually worked, it was one of the cutest girls I´ve been with to this day, and all because of a silly made-up name.
2 . The name I´d call myself if I were a p*rn actor:
HUNTER CHIPMUNK
3 . The name I´d give to my dog: (to be applied strictly for German Shepherds)
THE PROFESSOR
4. The name I´d give to my dog: (for all other breeds)
BUCKET
5. The name for the one book I´ll never get down to write:
THE RISE AND FALL OF THE KRALLIAN GALACTIC EMPIRE, which doesn´t mean anything and would work quite well with any subject whatsoever. You know, the Krallian Galactic Empire as a metaphor for world peace, teenage love, economics, etc.
6 . The name I´d give to my own country, if I were to become the ruler of my own country:
CREAM OF TARTAR
7 . The name I´d call myself if I were a super-hero:
THE BREAK-EVEN MAN! Boy, that´s a time-tested classic…
8 . Back to my fictional, made-up country form item #6, here´s the name of its monetary unit:
KRELIG, plural: Kreligs.
9 . Still on that rather silly (sillier?) subject, here´s the name for my metric-scale stand-in:
KRELIG, plural: Kreligs, also valid for measuring Temperature and Time. I´ve never been really comfortable with having different units/names for measuring stuff, so I´ve decided it´s so much easier to come up with one single name for everything. Think about it because it actually makes (a little) sense.
10 . Last but not least and you obviously saw it coming, my own callsign if I were a “Naval Aviator” like the characters in Top Gun:
STARDUSTER, though I´d never be a wingman to Val Kilmer´s character. The beauty of this Starduster thing is, it´s the same name I created to myself back when I was a kid and I think that´s very… positive. Reassuring. I dunno.
I mean, guy goes the distance and it´s like fifteen? Twenty years later or what? and he actually remembers how´d he call himself if he were a character in a movie. Blogging is one big egotrip that´s for sure, so I´ll let this one stand as a test for my own character. This kind of thing speaks tons about a person, you know?
If I were a girl, I´d marry me because of that one... :-)
[Oh c´mon, don´t give me that look! Top Gun *does* have a plot. It´s just not very… linear or coherent I guess. Anyway, I really should be posting a review about the Dave Eggers book I finished reading last night instead of this crap. Maybe later today, after lunch, who knows… Terrific book, though. Better than Top Gun.]
But really. That Val Kilmer character “Iceman” is just too creepy in the movie. What´s that all about anyway?!
…And here I was thinking I´m this big genius for the Top Gun comments above but I´ve just realized I´ve seen someone else on TV saying something to that effect, I just don´t recall whether it was Tarantino or Kevin Smith. So there for justice.
Aaaand back to the callsigns (Maverick, Iceman, et. al.)
Here´s a very silly list without a purpose in which the author, well, lists a series of names he´s thought up about subjects most diverse:
1 . The name I´d give myself if I were my own son, but without having intercourse with my mother: (of course!)
ERIC VON RUTGER,
and believe it or not I once tried that line on a girl back in High School and it actually worked, it was one of the cutest girls I´ve been with to this day, and all because of a silly made-up name.
2 . The name I´d call myself if I were a p*rn actor:
HUNTER CHIPMUNK
3 . The name I´d give to my dog: (to be applied strictly for German Shepherds)
THE PROFESSOR
4. The name I´d give to my dog: (for all other breeds)
BUCKET
5. The name for the one book I´ll never get down to write:
THE RISE AND FALL OF THE KRALLIAN GALACTIC EMPIRE, which doesn´t mean anything and would work quite well with any subject whatsoever. You know, the Krallian Galactic Empire as a metaphor for world peace, teenage love, economics, etc.
6 . The name I´d give to my own country, if I were to become the ruler of my own country:
CREAM OF TARTAR
7 . The name I´d call myself if I were a super-hero:
THE BREAK-EVEN MAN! Boy, that´s a time-tested classic…
8 . Back to my fictional, made-up country form item #6, here´s the name of its monetary unit:
KRELIG, plural: Kreligs.
9 . Still on that rather silly (sillier?) subject, here´s the name for my metric-scale stand-in:
KRELIG, plural: Kreligs, also valid for measuring Temperature and Time. I´ve never been really comfortable with having different units/names for measuring stuff, so I´ve decided it´s so much easier to come up with one single name for everything. Think about it because it actually makes (a little) sense.
10 . Last but not least and you obviously saw it coming, my own callsign if I were a “Naval Aviator” like the characters in Top Gun:
STARDUSTER, though I´d never be a wingman to Val Kilmer´s character. The beauty of this Starduster thing is, it´s the same name I created to myself back when I was a kid and I think that´s very… positive. Reassuring. I dunno.
I mean, guy goes the distance and it´s like fifteen? Twenty years later or what? and he actually remembers how´d he call himself if he were a character in a movie. Blogging is one big egotrip that´s for sure, so I´ll let this one stand as a test for my own character. This kind of thing speaks tons about a person, you know?
If I were a girl, I´d marry me because of that one... :-)
[Oh c´mon, don´t give me that look! Top Gun *does* have a plot. It´s just not very… linear or coherent I guess. Anyway, I really should be posting a review about the Dave Eggers book I finished reading last night instead of this crap. Maybe later today, after lunch, who knows… Terrific book, though. Better than Top Gun.]
posted by 186282mps at 7:47 AM
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