7/14/2006

Closer to free

Please state the situation in one sentence:
There’s this tall, gorgeous blonde with tons of dark eyeliner that shares the bus stop with me a few times a month.

Now consider this, picking up girls in public transportation- and I mean career girls, College education-level girls with jobs at high-profile companies. Not really brainy chicks per se, but close.
I wish I were that good.

Well, fret not, I’m working on it, I’m working on her, I’m working on everybody. Last night, for instance, considering a hypothetical increase on the input of ethanol I would’ve probably blown the established mileage and gone past the acceptable parameters for office-mate interaction, and dude, some hornet’s nest there. But I can hold my ground just as I can hold my booze.

Regardless of the scenario, though, I have finally come up with a conclusion, with the one thing a guy really needs when going after girls:
A leitmotif.

Everybody’s had a teacher or a boss whose secret nickname was Mr. Vader or something, and every time the guy entered the office, everybody would whistle John William’s Imperial March theme song. The one that went like, Da Da Dum Da Da Dum Da Da Dumm, with the heavy breathing in the background… and if we lived in a Hollywood world, each of us would have our own theme songs.

Like, picture this:
Me and tall, gorgeous blonde enter the bus, sit side-by side and begin a conversation; we laugh, we tell each other what we’ve been doing, etc. That’s what happens every time.
Now, enter the leitmotif:
I cross the avenue towards the bus stop, tall, gorgeous blonde is already there. From the moment she sees me there’s this sudden burst of music out of nowhere, and I’ve specifically chosen Batman’s own leitmotif from the 1990s’ Batman the Animated Series as my own. Ta ta tataaaa echoing though the nothingness of the vast urban spread, then he goes:


“It’s some damn peculiar fact that we’ve never met by chance at some place other than at the bus stop here”- Enter: Ta ta tataaaa -“Like at the movies, for instance.”