Oh Nikita you will never know
They hung this huge flag, the national flag, up the wall and I´m offering ten bucks for this guy to turn it upside down and he´s laughing because he´s thinking it´s just a prank only it´s not, because I look at the flag and the odd mixture of green and yellow makes me a little annoyed because I´m always a little annoyed when I see big things in primary colors thrown in with secondary colors. It just doesn´t seem right you know.
I´m thinking maybe I could go out on the pretense of buying cough medicine (as usual) and get a can of red paint then come back here and have some nasty stuff- obscenities, mostly, maybe a political statement or two- sprayed over the flag.
Yesterday I came up with this joke in which I´d come up to this guy at the office who attends some International Affairs course in College and ask if he knew the name of the USSR Premier who came after Nikita Khruschev, and of course he didn´t, not by heart, and I´d say, Come on, everybody knows it´s Leonid Brezhnev- then I´d send an e-mail to some other guys sitting around us explaining the prank and I´d ask each one of them, in front of the guy, if they knew the name of the Commie and everybody did but him, and he was so pissed.
Then for no reason whatsoever, and it was a slow day at work, I started browsing for web-sites about the duck-billed platypus & it turns out only the male platypus has venomous spurs on its hind legs. The female of the species does not.
Back home my room-mate was complaining that this girl he´s been dating since last year doesn´t want to do this thing in bed and I simply told him that it´s not for her to decide, aren´t you stronger for chrissakes?- To which he didn´t reply, only looked at me kind of spooked then said he didn´t expect that kind of answer from me of all people.
I shrugged and said I guessed he was right, that I wasn´t really paying attention.
The company I work in is changing banks so we´re now receiving our pay through this new bank, which we had to open an account there last month and this morning I saw a letter they sent me saying I currently had $0.00 on my account (first paycheck through the new bank is only due next month) but since I´d been such a good customer I was good for this multi-billionaire loan if only I´d apply... I thought no, thanks and thought of pouring cashews with the corn flakes which I did then did the dishes and brushed my teeth (forgot to floss) and left at 06:11 am as usual for work.
I´m thinking maybe I could go out on the pretense of buying cough medicine (as usual) and get a can of red paint then come back here and have some nasty stuff- obscenities, mostly, maybe a political statement or two- sprayed over the flag.
Yesterday I came up with this joke in which I´d come up to this guy at the office who attends some International Affairs course in College and ask if he knew the name of the USSR Premier who came after Nikita Khruschev, and of course he didn´t, not by heart, and I´d say, Come on, everybody knows it´s Leonid Brezhnev- then I´d send an e-mail to some other guys sitting around us explaining the prank and I´d ask each one of them, in front of the guy, if they knew the name of the Commie and everybody did but him, and he was so pissed.
Then for no reason whatsoever, and it was a slow day at work, I started browsing for web-sites about the duck-billed platypus & it turns out only the male platypus has venomous spurs on its hind legs. The female of the species does not.
Back home my room-mate was complaining that this girl he´s been dating since last year doesn´t want to do this thing in bed and I simply told him that it´s not for her to decide, aren´t you stronger for chrissakes?- To which he didn´t reply, only looked at me kind of spooked then said he didn´t expect that kind of answer from me of all people.
I shrugged and said I guessed he was right, that I wasn´t really paying attention.
The company I work in is changing banks so we´re now receiving our pay through this new bank, which we had to open an account there last month and this morning I saw a letter they sent me saying I currently had $0.00 on my account (first paycheck through the new bank is only due next month) but since I´d been such a good customer I was good for this multi-billionaire loan if only I´d apply... I thought no, thanks and thought of pouring cashews with the corn flakes which I did then did the dishes and brushed my teeth (forgot to floss) and left at 06:11 am as usual for work.
posted by 186282mps at 9:30 AM
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